Monday 30th November:

Exultation as we find a copy of Monday's Times of London in the Concierge Lounge, and a report of the Tigers Bath game at Welford Road. On a wet, windy and cold day, Welford Road is no place for the faint hearted and albeit outplayed for long periods of the game, Tigers beat Bath 21-11, with Bath missing a losing bonus point by eschewing a shot at goal for a line out at the death that they failed to convert. More amazing statistics revealed that Tigers have won 178 of 210 games at Welford Road since the start of the Premiership, and Bath have not beaten Tigers at Welford Road in the Premiership since 2003, oh deep joy!

A lazy day at sea, beginning with a very good talk about Namibia from a guy called Terry Bishop; he walked 120 miles across the Namib desert for charity, Adventure for Dementia, amazing that he remembered most of the story. Decide it was time to go to the gym, only to find the first two treadmills out of order, and the one I did use did not have the incline working, which meant I had to resort to, yes running, 25 minutes out of 50 minutes, and surprisingly, quite comfortable at 10kph.

We join the Trivia in the afternoon, hosted by Cruise Director Ray, a funny guy. It's always better when the Cruise Director does Trivia, because they put so much more into it. Our team USCANUK, a tri-nation combo, performs only moderately well, and we will need to have a clearly nominated scribe, not sure it will be Lorna, but we'll see how sharp her elbows are, and whether she can edge Ian out. The alternative name for a similar team in the past was CANUSUK, which pronounced correctly gets a laugh every time, doesn't it Ray?

Captain's party and of course we're a little late, and all the seats are occupied, it seems like you need to be at least 30 minutes early for anything if you want to miss the queue, or get a seat. Having said that, there were plenty of sun beds, even when the sun was out. Dinner again with Sue & Dennis, and I have to say they are good company, and we laugh a lot. Sue is good for a little bit of double entendre, and sometimes single entendre. The Thai Bride with the Bog Boobies keeps us amused for some time, and we have a long discussion as to whether she takes her enormous eye lashes off before having sex, or after, or keeps them on all night, and what would she look like without all the enhancements.

Lorna has taken to Marcela, and Marcela has taken to Lorna and they have a heart to heart about Marcela's friend who sadly has leukemia, and only 18 months to live. Lorna consoles her, and finds out that she used to be a pretty well known ballerina, and with her husband danced in many top shows and around the world. Interestingly her feet give the game away, the shape of her ankles suggest that she lives in nine inch heels or has been a ballerina, so yes the latter.

I start three books, The Lady in The Van, The Last Man in Russia, and A Penniless Adventure the Length of Britain. Couldn't get into the first, quite a way into the second, although faltering, and already having a good laugh at the third and only just read the first few pages. Seems like the humour will win through, although I still hope to finish the book about Russia and it's deep, alcoholic, declining population malaise.

Some discomfort during and after lunch, but a comfortable evening meal and a good night's sleep, no heartburn, no palpitations, no bread now for two days, will keep it up.